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Polyamorous Question 

Kroddors84 Offline


Joined: Oct 2017
Posts: 1 / Rep: 0
Post: #1

Hi, this is my first post on this forum and I’m just looking to see if anyone on here shares similar thoughts on relationships to me.

I am a male in my mid 20s and I struggle with relationships. I could be with the most beautiful girl in the world who has the most wonderful body and I would always want somebody different.

This has always been the case and I struggle to maintain relationships but my eyes can not stayed fixed on the one person and I always end up wanting to cheat/cheating.

I struggle to commit to sex with my wife because I prefer to masturbate to other girls through porn or thoughts if people that I know etc.

I want to make it clear that my thoughts aren’t that I’m just a cheater because it’s deeper than that. I’m completely happy in my marriage and I wouldn’t change who I’m with, I just appreciate the beauty of others and I really want to share that love.

The trouble is, I think I’m polyamorous and it’s very difficult to explain to somebody who isn’t, that the feelings are different to wanting to cheat. It’s not about cheating, I enjoy the cuddles and warmth of being with my wife but the thought of sleeping with others exhilarates me.

Are there other polyamorous people on this forum? And how you do deal with your urges and coach the message to people who just can’t comprehend it?

I’m falling into a pit of unhappiness because I feel it’s either leave my wife, which means not being with my children as much. Or stay and be unhappy that I’m not being stimulated in the sexual way that I desire.

Can it be both?
07 Jun 2021 12:00
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Running Man Offline
Happy To Share


Joined: Nov 2016
Posts: 2,608 / Rep: 430
Post: #2
RE: Polyamorous

Hi there Kroddors and welcome to the forum.
That's a really intense first post you've made and I'm afraid that I don't feel able to offer you any worthwhile advice.
However, I feel sure that others on here will be able to offer you some valid thoughts and guidance with your dilemma.
Good luck.

Nil Satis Nisi Optimum 
07 Jun 2021 15:02
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Jb6969 Offline
Senior Member


Joined: Mar 2017
Posts: 509 / Rep: 83
Post: #3
RE: Polyamorous

Hi.. while the same as RM I'd like to venture out to say that communication is the key to any relationship, although I can imagine broaching a subject like "I'd like to sleep with other people" could be tricky. Others do have they in their relationships though so you never know. My other point would be to ask yourself WHY you feel this need?? It sounds like you love your wife but you lust after others. Understanding that reason might help to either process this yourself or explain it to the Mrs better.

And porn / fantasy are just that... not real. I struggled with that for a long time. I accepted I had a porn addiction (still do.. recovering alcoholic analogy etc), There more to sexual interactions than the physical act.
(This post was last modified: 07 Jun 2021 22:28 by Jb6969.)
07 Jun 2021 22:25
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